Consider how someone who drives you crazy, who frustrates the hell out of you, holds traits that bother you that remind you of yourself.
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My reflections shared and bared:
I thought of my son, who was making me nuts at the time of practicing ahimsa (peace) and discovered a lot.
His disrespectful words are my karma. They are the same defiant words I used on my parents to challenge them, to see if they would break, and give me what I wanted. It is his strength, boldness, honesty, and independence I also was testing at that age (and unfortunately for many years to come.) It is the same traits my dad wanted to instill in me as a female, who could stand up for her beliefs and not let someone push her around.
His poor listening skills are another trait of mine, that I have realized is lacking. I often listen very well to my clients, but not so much to those I share space with on the daily. I allow the distractions, as he does, to tune me out.
His impatience is also a quality that I don't enjoy about myself. How can I be more patient? How can I begin to understand that not all things happen on my timeline?
His negativity, and this might be the kicker, I see in myself. I, unfortunately, know this trait is all mine. He has seen it growing up with a mother who tries to up-shine her negativity into "I am just a realist." And now, karma says, "Hey do you hear that? That is you talking, those are your words coming out of someone else's mouth. What are you going to do about it?"
What am I going to do about it? That is the question. Will you grow up to be a man who sees the qualities you aren't so fond of in yourself, shine through in your children? Probably. But hopefully for both of us, it makes us grow and change to be better parents, better spouses and most of all better humans.
Be better.
Footnote: I read this and reflect again in 2026 before this book goes to print and I realize in the past 7 years or so my listening skills have far improved. I am much more patient and am much less rigid if plans don't go my way. I no longer say, "I'm a realist." I realized that it is just one of the many things I say that I no longer believe are true. I'm breaking the habit of saying things out loud I no longer believe. We are all going to have karma, I now see my karma as a lesson. I can open my eyes to see the lesson or I can ignore it. More often than not, I contemplate and reflect so that the lesson can be learned and moved on from.
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